I couldn't relate more. I'm a Native American (who happened to snag all the Caucasian genes, so I basically look like a white version of my family members with my reddish brown hair, green hazel eyes and all that), gay, NB, and likely autistic and have been lectured for "not understanding" or "being bigoted". I once even received a condescending lecture about how I have no right to talk about Native American issues or call myself Native American because I was basically "uneducated" and "not a part of that group." Even though I am blood related and was raised being taught the culture at my school (for YEARS as it WAS a school for Native Americans). Although I still face discrimination (people think we're lazy and lesser) and have it written on my legal documents that I am Native American, so that's interesting.
Also being told that I am misogynistic and fetishizing when I ship two male characters together or make a girl the bad guy for once since I always make male characters the bad guy. I've literally been called a yaoi author. Like I'm just some cishet girl who hates other women with a passion. Excuse me, but I am AFAB and happen to have a gf. And if you knew me, you'd know that I'm actually probably a little overboard with my feminism.